1.1母亲两度患癌催生了我的梦想
1.1 Mother twice suffered from cancer hastened parturition to my dream
 
应该说，每个人的内心深处都有梦想，有自己的人生理想和追求，对幸福生活的诉求与期待。一般人的梦想，大多都是对未来生活的憧憬，而我却与往事关联。我的梦想，起源于母亲的两次癌症，因为癌症夺走了我母亲的生命。从那时起，我就感觉癌症是人类未解密的黑洞。
It should be said that everybody has dreams in the privacy of his thoughts, his own ideal and the pursuit of life， appeal and expectation of happy life. Most people’s dreams are always expectation for the future life, my dream, however, was related to the past which originated from mother’s twice suffering cancer, as the cancer had taken away my mother’s life. From then on, I felt that cancer was the un-decoded black hole of human beings.
 
母亲第一次患癌，让我立志要成为一名医生；母亲第二次患癌，让我有了“破解癌症黑洞密码，救治更多母亲”的梦想。和千千万万个家庭一样，母亲将自己无私的爱，全部给了我。
The first time that my mother suffered cancer made me devote to be a doctor; and the second time made me have the dream “to decode the black hole of cancer for more mothers”. Since my mother had given me all her selfless love just as the others in thousands and thousands families.
 
小时候我有一个充满了爱的家庭，父亲没有像爷爷那样从文，而是从小喜爱习武，并且很有造诣。他年轻时靠打拳卖艺为生，走遍全国，哥们儿义气的朋友一大帮，解放前在国民党军队当过武术教官，后因帮助老乡逃离监狱而犯下错，离开了国民党部队。也因此在解放初期入狱三年，即所谓的“历史反革命”。尽管如此，父亲还于20世纪50年代在济南部队当过业余教官，教解放军武术。小时候我经常跟着爸爸练拳脚，学了一些武术功夫，以至于后来去了美国，还教美国老太太们太极拳，那已是后话。母亲是个贤惠能干的女人，家里的一切事务从没让父亲操心。母亲生下四个孩子，我排行老三，家里还有两个姐姐和一个妹妹。可能是家里的唯一男孩吧，表面看不出来，实际上母亲非常偏爱我，我经常跟人说，我是在母亲的慈爱庇护下长大。
My childhood was spent in a family with full of love. My father, instead to be a literary man like my grandfather,who liked to practice martial art as a child  and he got a lot of attainments on it. When he was young, my father made a living by boxing and busking，traveled all the country and made a lot of buddy friends. He was a martial arts instructor in Kuomintang’s army before liberation, later committed for helping a fellow villager escape from prison and then departed, for this my father was closed in prison for three years in the period of initial post-liberation, i.e. the so-called “history counterrevolutionary” In spite of this, father still served as a amateur instructor in Jinan troops in 1950s, teaching the people's Liberation Army martial arts. When I was a child, I often followed father to practice Chinese boxing, learned some martial art and Kung Fu, so after l went to USA I taught American old ladies Taijiquan, but that is the later story. My mother was a virtuous and capable woman who undertook all home affairs and never let my father worry about. She gave birth to four children, and I was the third, so I have two elder sisters and a younger at home. Maybe just as I was the only boy in the family, in fact, mother gave me most of her love partially and you cannot look it out from surface. I often said to someone that I was growing up under mother’s affection and asylum.
 北京翻译公司哪个好-北京翻译公司哪家比较好-北京翻译公司哪家好
记得小时候，夏天在外玩，回来时一定要喝水，三碗水在桌上，我知道哪个碗里有糖，姐妹却不知道，那是母亲特意给我准备的。每次过大年，母亲肯定会给我做一身新衣服。说是新衣服，其实就是大人的衣服改装的，而姐姐们和妹妹大多都穿着旧衣服过年。家里要是赶上有好吃的，即使我没在家，母亲也会给我留出一些。二姐发现母亲偏向我，总是和我对着干，有时我俩还扭打在一起。小妹虽然年幼，却反而事事都让着我。父亲对我虽然严厉，但我一直是个听话、乖巧的孩子，从来不惹是生非，在学校学习中又一直名列前茅，平素不苟言笑的父亲，从来没对我训斥过。父亲每次外出，妹妹都想跟去，父亲总说不行，却早已暗示我，让我在大街的路口等他，与他同行。那时的我，虽不像现在的独生子女，却享受着全家人的呵护。
When I was a child, I remembered, in summer, when we come back after playing outside, we must to drink a plenty of water, while three bowls of water on the table, only me can tell which one has sugar in it, and my sisters do not know that, since it was specially prepared for me by mother. Every Spring Festival, mother was certain to make a new dress for me. The so called new dress, in fact, was modified from the adult’s clothes, while my sisters were always dressed in old clothes to celebrate the Spring Festival. Occasionally there was some tasty at home, and even if I was outside, mother would also leave some for me. The second-eldest sister found that mother was partial to me, so she always acted against me, and sometimes scuffled in together with me. While though my little sister was very young, she gave way to me in everything. Although my father was strict and usually serious in speech and manner, since I was an obedient, clever boy, never stirred up any troubles and my study at school was always in front of the others, he had never reprimanded me. Every time father would go out, my younger sister usually wanted to go with him, but my father always said no to her, while earlier hinted me going to the crossing in the street to wait him. At that time, though I was not the only child of the family as today’s, I enjoyed the caring and protection from the whole family.
 
在20世纪60年代初期，能够让人填饱肚子的食物，成了全国人民的奢侈品。那时，由于父亲在国民党军队里工作过，被打成了“反革命分子”，遣返回农村老家。返乡前父亲是运输公司的搬运工，还可以养家糊口，但是回到农村，就没有了生活来源。全家人靠着亲朋和邻里的帮助，勉强过日子，经常是吃不饱、穿不暖。
In the early1960s, the food that could fill the stomachs of people had become the national luxury. At that time, as my father worked ever in the Kuomintang’ army, he was called the "counter revolutionaries" and sent back to the countryside. Be a porter in a transportation company before returning the countryside, barely supporting the family, while in countryside father lost the life source. All the family managed to get along depending on the helps of kinfolks, friends and neighbors, often scarce of food and clothes.
 
在动荡起落的“文革”时期，父亲虽是“反革命”，但子女没有罪啊！在母亲的争取和努力下，我和母亲又回到济南，但是我们家的房子已经被邻居占据，派出所的民警就让我们住到了邻居家的三间北屋中的东间。一个屋檐下，难免磕磕碰碰，有几次还吵了起来。那时，母亲不放心在乡下的爸爸和姐姐们，常常回东平探望。记得有一天，我放学回家，院子里没有大人，小孩也不搭理我。我就在门外溜达，忽然眼睛一亮，看到同院的邻居洪大娘晒在窗台上的熟地瓜干，我的肚子马上就咕咕地叫了起来，口水都流出来了，我实在是太饿了。心想，就吃一块吧，洪大娘没在家，吃一块又看不出来。吃上一块地瓜干后，感到更饿了，那肚子就好像装着一个正在转悠的轱辘，叫起来似乎还有节奏，我就间隔着拿起地瓜干，一块一块往嘴里塞，直到自己感到大娘可能要看出来了，这才收手，找小朋友玩去了。第二天也如此这般，时间一长，地瓜干就所剩无几了。
In the turbulent period of the "Cultural Revolution", though father was the "counter revolutionary", while the children were innocent! Due to mother's trying and efforts, mother and I went back to Jinan, whereas our house had been occupied by neighbors and the police let us live in the East of three north rooms of a neighbor. Under one roof, it was hard to avoid bumps one with another, and for several times quarrelling happened. At that time, mother felt worried about my father and sisters in the countryside, often she went to Dongping to see them. One day, I came home from school, no adults in the yard, and the children did not talk with me, then I strolled outside, suddenly a bright light flashed before my eyes, I saw neighbor Aunt Hong’s cooked dry sweet potatoes sunned on the sills, immediately I felt so hungry with stomach cooing up and slobber flowing out. I thought it was nothing to have a piece, after all, Aunt Hong was not at home, even if I ate a piece and she could not perceive it.  Eaten a piece of dried sweet potato, while I felt more hungry and my belly sounded with rhythm as if there was a rotating wheel contained in it, so every now and then I picked up pieces of dry sweet potatoes putting into my mouth one by one, until I felt that Aunt Hong might perceive it then I stopped to play with my little friends. The second day, such and such things was going on, as time went a long, there was not much left.
忘了过了多久，母亲回来了，责备我不该偷吃地瓜干，并高高举起了手要打我。可能是我那害怕的表情让母亲有些心软吧，母亲抬起的右手只是有些用力地摸了摸我的头，叹了一口气。原来几次偷吃，邻居洪大娘全看在眼里，但她没有阻止我，她笑着跟母亲说：“这孩子真饿坏了。”这是我记忆中第一次犯错，也是唯一一次差点挨打。瞧，母亲有多么疼爱我！至今一想起此事，我就想流泪，就非常想念我的母亲。  

I forgot how long it passed, then mother came back who blamed me for eating the dry sweet potato furtively, she raised her hand high to slap me. Maybe my scared face made mother be softhearted, and her raised right hand only touched my head hard, with a sigh. Originally, what I had done several times was seen by neighbor Aunt Hong, while she did not stop me, she told mother with a smile: “The boy was really hungry.” This was the first time in my memory that I made a mistake, and the only time that I nearly was beaten. Look, how much my mother loved me, so far, once I think of it, tears was  flowing , and I missed my mother very badly.  

1970年，由于父亲历史问题的原因，本来已经返回济南的我们，又一次被遣返回东平。不过大姐已经参加了工作，所以就留在了济南城里。返乡的头一天，一辆解放牌大卡车停在家门口，全部家当都被装上了车。第二天，满载着人和东西的车走了大半天，就到了东平接山乡夏谢村。到了村头停下车，村四大队的书记来迎接我们。然后我们一家人住进一个牛棚，一走进去还闻到一股牛粪味。
In 1970, due to father’s historical problem, my mother and I, who had returned to Jinan, were once again deported to Dongping, merely my eldest sister had worked and she stayed. The day to return, a big Jiefang truck parked at our door, then all the bag and baggage were loaded in it. On the second day, the truck which was loaded full of persons and baggage took most of the day arriving at the village of Xiaxie, Jieshan Xiang, Dongping County. As soon as the truck stopped, the secretaries from four big teams in the village came to welcome us. Then our families lived in a bullpen where I sniffed out a smell of cow dung as I entered.
 
小时候，我脾气挺倔，母亲说，我有着不达目的誓不罢休的劲头。记得有一次，已经在济南水泥制品厂上班的大姐回来看望我们，住了两天大姐就要回济南，我就闹着要跟着去，母亲虽不让，但表面上答应了，因为那时我已经在农村上小学了。第二天一大早，大姐就去大（这里读dai）羊乡车站，沿着山区的小道，乘车回济南了，我醒来发现她不在，知道大姐已经走了，就往门外跑去。到车站的路有十五里，一路上我边跑边喊，可是已经看不到大姐的身影，但我没有停下来。那时山间的路难走啊，根本没有像样的路，还要路过一片坟地，我跑出了大约十五里，那车早已没了踪影。回家后，我郁郁寡欢，精神恍惚，母亲发现后，感觉有些不对劲。因为我曾路过坟地，邻居大妈就提醒母亲：“是不是被鬼缠上了？快做做法事吧。”还是母亲了解儿子，“这是他的犟脾气啊。”十几天后，济南东平的老乡回夏谢村探亲，母亲就恳托济南老乡骑着自行车带着我，一大早四点钟就出发，一路直奔济南。到了晚上六点终于到达大姐家，两百多里的路啊，我的屁股几乎要颠破了。在济南住了一个月，我的情绪稳定下来，大姐才把我送回了东平。母亲啊，你太了解儿子，也太宠着儿子了！
When I was young, I was very stubborn, mother said that I had a spirit of not up until the goal. I remember once my eldest sister came back to see us who had worked in the factory of Jinan cement product, after living with us for two days, she would return to Jinan, and I wanted to go with her naughtily, mother did not permit while promised on the surface, as I had gone to school at that time，a rural primary school. Early on the second day, my eldest sister went to Daiyang Xiang station, along with the mountain trail, riding back to Jinan. I woke up and found her out, realizing sister had gone, I ran toward the door. The way to the station is fifteen miles, I shouted as I ran, while couldn't see eldest sister’s figure, but I didn't stop. At that time it was difficult to walk on the mountain road, for there was no decent way at all, still someone needed to pass by a cemetery, I had run for about fifteen miles to get the station, but the bus had been out of sight for a long time. After returning home, I felt depressed and my mind was wandering. When mother noticed, she felt something was wrong with me. Since I had passed the cemetery, a neighbor aunt reminded my mother:”Whether the boy was tangled by the demon? Conduct a religious rite quickly.” Nevertheless, mother knew her son, she said: “it was just because of his stubborn temper.”More than ten days later, a fellow-villager from Dongping，Jinan was returning to Xia Xie village to visit relatives, mother requested him sincerely to take me to Jinan by bicycle. Early in the morning we set off at four o'clock, went straight to Jinan all the way, eventually we arrived my eldest sister’s home at six o’clock in the evening. After the journey of more than two hundred miles, my ass was almost jolted to broken. Living in Jinan for a month, until my emotion was stabilized, then my eldest sister brought me back to Dongping. My mother, you are so understand your son, and you doted on your son too!
20世纪70年代，积劳成疾的母亲患了宫颈癌。不忍看着母亲受到病痛折磨，才12岁的我， 就用板车拉她去公社医院看病，医生说是癌症的那瞬间几乎吓死我。可怕的癌症，那是我第一次听到它的名字。第二天母亲被送去了济南，在大姐的关怀和医生的积极治疗下有了好转。从那时起，我最大的梦想就是当一名医生。我太爱母亲了，每当听到母亲的呻吟，就好比刀子在剜我的心。那时在学校学习根本不是为了自己，而是为了母亲……1977年恢复高考，我如愿以偿，考进了青岛医学院北镇分院。我要当一名医生的愿望太迫切啦。
In 1970s, mother was broken down from constant overwork, suffering from the cervical cancer. I could not bear to see mother was tortured by the disease, just 12 years old, I pulled her to the commune hospital with plate trailer. It almost scared me to death at the moment when the doctor said it was cancer. The terrible cancer, it is the first time I heard the name of it. The second day mother was sent to Jinan, then it took a turn for the better as mother was under my eldest sister’s caring and the active treatment of the doctors. Since then, my biggest dream is to be a doctor. I loved my mother so much, whenever I heard mother moaning, it liked using a knife cut out my heart. At that time I learnt in the school which was not for myself, but for my mother...... When the college entrance examination was resumed in 1977, I had got my wish, entering Beizhen Branch of Qingdao Medical Academy. My wish of being a doctor was too urgent.
 
我在医学院学习的四年中，成绩一直名列前茅。毕业后，我被分配到山东省肿瘤防治研究院（现山东省肿瘤医院）工作，不久，又被派往中国医科院肿瘤医院进修。
During the four years I learned in the medical college, my grades was always at the top of the list. After graduation, I was assigned to work in the Research Institute on Tumor Prevention of Shandong Province (now the Tumor Hospital of Shandong Province), before long, I was sent to study in the tumor hospital of Chinese Medical College.
 
天有不测风云，就在研修最忙的时候，操劳一生的母亲又一次患上了癌症，是食道癌。这对于我来说，打击太大了，母亲是我精神上的依靠，我不能失去她。我停止在京的学习，回到济南，我一边关注母亲的病情，一边更加发奋地学习，下决心要研究食道癌，为母亲治病。可是用尽了自己所有的知识和办法，化疗放疗都做了，还是没有挽留住母亲的性命。母亲带着对人世间的留恋和对子女们的企盼，撒手人寰。
Something unexpected may happen any time. Just as I was very busy with my research and studies, mother who had worked hard for all her life suffered from cancer again, which was esophageal cancer. This striking on me was too hard, as mother was the dependence my spirits relied on, and I could not lose her. I stopped my study in Beijing and returned Jinan. While I paid attention to mother’s illness, I was learning more strenuously, determined to study esophageal cancer to cure mother. But I exhausted all my knowledge and methods, done with both chemotherapy and radiotherapy, did not I retain mother’s life. Mother died with nostalgia for the world and the hope for her children.
 
我终于明白，靠目前手术和放疗、化疗的治疗方法，根本不可能在癌症治疗上取得实质性突破，要想挽救千千万万的癌症患者，必须有一种新的治疗方法出现。母亲过世时，我还是一个单身，母亲曾经那么迫切想看到我能够完婚，但最终还是没有实现。在安葬母亲后，我看到老家有患食道癌的老乡，没条件治疗却还活着，对我真是一个打击。这是多么大的讽刺啊！山东省肿瘤医院的肿瘤医生，连自己母亲的病都治不好，我心中痛苦极了。同时，这也让我对癌症的研究和治疗有了诸多的质疑。为了研究，我在自己身上打过针做过实验，以至于经常浑身肿胀，出现了全身不适反应。
I eventually understood that it was impossible to achieve substantive breakthrough in treatment of cancer by operation and radiotherapy, chemotherapy present, in order to save thousands on thousands of cancer patients, there must be a new therapeutic method. When mother died, I was a single. Mother once so desperately wanted to see I was married, but it was not ultimately implemented. After the burial, I observed a fellow-villager at our native place who had suffered from esophageal cancer was still alive without treatment as he could not afford the cost. This was really a blow to me, how ironic it was! Be a oncology doctor from Shandong Provincial Tumor Hospital, I even could not cure my own mother's illness, my heart was very painful. At the same time, it also made me to have many questions on research and treatment of cancer. In order to study, I had done injections and experiments in my own body, so which was often swelled, arising a body discomfort since.
 
中国医科院肿瘤医院的同事们看到我如此这般，觉得我可能是因母亲的病逝受到了刺激，钻牛角尖了，都劝我别那么疯狂，调整一下自己的心态再做研究。但我没有停下来，母亲都被癌症夺去了生命，身为一个肿瘤研究者，你说我会是什么样的感受？一个念头总闪现在我的脑海里：为什么我们总被癌症屠杀，却对它一点办法都没有？一定是我们做得太少了。要想拯救千千万万的癌症患者不再被癌症夺走生命，不抓紧时间研究怎么能行呢？
The colleagues from the Cancer Hospital of Chinese Medical College saw me like this, and thought maybe I was stimulated by mother’s death and was heading into a blind alley, so they advised me not to do so crazy, adjusting my own mentality then to research again. But I did not stop. My mother died just because of cancer, as a cancer researcher, what a kind of feeling, you say, I would have? An idea always flashed in my mind: why were we always slaughtered by cancer but having no way for it? It must be that we did too little. In order to save thousands and thousands of patients from the killing of cancer, how could you do it not to seize the time to study?
 
母亲不在了，夜间我常常从噩梦中醒来，心脏狂跳不止。梦里的自己身穿白大褂推着轮椅，轮椅上坐着患病的母亲，似乎要去做身体检查，医院的走廊很长很长，我推着母亲走啊，走啊，老是走不到头……走廊两侧站着很多人，他们用那种鄙视的眼光盯着我，人群中不少人对我指指点点，我都不敢抬头看他们。我听到人们议论我：“身为一个医生，一个研究癌症的医生，连自己母亲的病都治不了，这算是什么医生啊？”我面红耳赤，脑子里乱哄哄的，赶忙疾步向前。一直走一直走，我都累得气喘吁吁了，还是看不到化验室的门。这时，一群面目狰狞的人纷纷围了上来，又是一顿无休止的指责，这时候我忽然失去控制，大吼一声：“走开！”惊醒后，我出了一身冷汗，这才发现自己是在梦中。
Mother had gone, while at night I often wake up from a nightmare with heart pounding. In the dreams, I was in the white coat, pushing a wheelchair in which sat the sick mother, seeming to want to do physical examination. The hospital corridor was very long, pushing mother， I walked, walked, and always went round......A lot of people were standing on both sides of the corridor, stared at me with that kind of contempt eyes, quite a few in the crowd were pointing at me, I did not dare to look at them. I heard the people talking about me: "As a doctor, a cancer doctor, even his own mother's disease cannot be cured, what a doctor is it?"
我面红耳赤，脑子里乱哄哄的，赶忙疾步向前。一直走一直走，我都累得气喘吁吁了，还是看不到化验室的门。这时，一群面目狰狞的人纷纷围了上来，又是一顿无休止的指责，这时候我忽然失去控制，大吼一声：“走开！”惊醒后，我出了一身冷汗，这才发现自己是在梦中。
I flushed with shame, and my brain was noisy, then I quickly hurtled forward. Walked and walked all along till I was tired to pant for breath, still I could not see the laboratory door. At this time, a group of people with fierce looking gathered around me, and there was another endless criticism, just then I suddenly lost control with a big growl: "Go away!" Waken up, I broke out in a cold sweat and found that it was a dream.
 
　　我曾无数次地重复着类似的梦境。
癌症对我来说，是疮疤、是泪痕、是耻辱……癌症就是一个大灾难。对于患者、家庭、亲人们来说，癌症就是狰狞的杀人犯，癌症“黑洞”之谜何时能解开？何时能见到一束阳光？我能做些什么？这是日后我一直没有放弃癌症研究和治疗的重要原因。
I had ever repeated similar dreams for many times.
Cancer, for me, was the scar, the tear stains; the shame...... cancer was just a major disaster. For the patients, the families and the relatives, cancer was a ferocious killer, when would the mystery of cancer "black hole" be solved? When could the people see a beam of sunlight? What can I do? This was the major reason why I would never give up the research and treatment of cancer in the future.
 
为了这个抗癌中国梦，为了那一束穿透癌症“黑洞”的阳光，我踏进了癌症“黑洞”里，三十多年如一日，闷在了这个“黑洞”中；我投入了我全部的精力，夜以继日地与癌症抗争，执着地一路走来。
In order to realize the China dream of anticancer as well as to obtain a beam of sunlight penetrating the cancer "black hole", I stepped into the cancer "black hole", taking more than thirty years as one day, closed myself in the "black hole"; I put all my energy round the clock into the battle with cancer, tenaciously go through the whole journey.
 
1.2自始至终就想成为一个高尚的肿瘤医生
1.2 I wanted to be a noble oncologist all the way
 
癌症“黑洞”究竟是什么，里面都包含着怎样的东西？1988年我从协和医科大学硕士研究生毕业时，对此并没有清楚的认识。1990年我凭自己的勤奋和成就，收到了美国加州圣地亚哥医学院的博士后研究邀请，辞去原本待遇丰厚的中日友好医院的工作，孤注一掷远赴大洋彼岸寻求攻克癌魔的方法，希望再深入一点去探索癌症“黑洞”，找到那束阳光，实现自己追求的梦想。
What on earth is the cancer "black hole"? What a kind of things are contained inside? I had no clear understanding on these questions when I graduated from Union Medical College in 1988. In 1990, I received the invitation for postdoctoral research from the Medical College of California, San Diego, USA. relying on my hard work and achievements, then I resigned the work in China-Japan Friendship Hospital which was very lucrative to seek ways of conquering cancer on the other side of the ocean with the idea of throwing the helve after the hatchet, wished to go further a little to explore cancer "black hole", finding the beam of sunlight, to realize my dreams.
 
没有其他的追求，也不想追求那些虚的荣耀与头衔，我就想成为一个高尚的肿瘤医生，为人类攻克癌症“黑洞”做一点贡献。
Neither other pursuit, nor the wants to pursue the false glory and titles, I just want to be a noble oncologist, contribute a little for human by conquering cancer "black hole".
 
到美国学习，因为受到了导师斯奈尔·金（Sinil Kims）的影响，向他学习缓释库这个概念及应用方法。与此同时，我意识到自己缺少许多知识，急需充实自己，特别是分子生物知识。
Learning in American, I was affected by my supervisor Sinil Kims and learned the concept and application methods of sustained-release base from him. At that time, I was aware of that I lacked a lot of knowledge, and urgently need to enrich myself, especially the knowledge on molecular biological.  
 
我是恢复高考后的第一届大学生，虽然基础不错，但医学大学生主要以生物、生化等比较基础的学科为主，授课时间比较短，内容比较浅显，是以临床方面知识为主，大学毕业做住院医生是完全可以胜任，但是做研究工作就差得太远了。
I was one of the college students from the first session after the resumption of college entrance examination, although the base of my knowledge was good, the medical college students mainly learn the comparatively basis subjects such as biological, biochemical and so on, and the teaching time was short, the content was relatively simple, principally with the clinical knowledge. The one who graduated from the medical college was fully qualified to be a resident doctor, but too far to the research work.
读研究生时，自己的水平得到了进一步提高。当年，考取硕士研究生的比例非常小，专业分得很细。在国内，我的研究方向是核医学、肾上腺嗜铬细胞瘤的显像、淋巴结显像剂等。
When I was pursuing the master degree, my medicine level had been further improved. The year when I obtained the permission, the proportion of admission for graduate was very small, and profession was shared very fine. In China, my research direction was a nuclear medicine, imaging of adrenal pheochromocytoma, lymph node imaging agent and so on.
 
到了美国，研究方向变了，知识就有些不太够用了。跟着导师做过几年的分子生物学研究，确实填补了我的短板。在分子生物学的大潮中，至少我不说外行话了，至少我更能理解生物治疗中的关键点及相关的联系了。
In the USA, my research direction changed, and then my knowledge was something not enough. It really filled up my weak points following the supervisor to research on molecular biology for several years. In the tide of molecular biology, at least I didn't speak in layman's language any more, and at least I could understand better the key points and related links of biological treatment .
 
我很注意参加索尔克生物研究所(Salk、Institute for Biological Studies）和圣地亚哥加州大学（University of California, San Diego）的各种学术会议、讲座，有些讲座可能完全与我的研究无关，我也一样参加，为的是受受启发，看看能否找到我感兴趣的内容，尤其是癌症治疗方面的新点子或新思路。学术会也多数与我的目的相差甚远，我只是听听，当作练英语，当作休息，这些学术讲座会都备有饮料及小吃，我就当作休闲。
I paid great attention to the various academic conferences, lectures at Salk Institute for Biological Studies and University of California, San Diego. Some of the lectures had nothing to do with my research, which I also attended to be inspired and to have a look whether I could find something I was interested about, especially the new ideas or new thoughts on cancer treatment. Most of the academic conferences also differed very far from my purpose, which I just listened to as a practicing of English and a rest. As in these lectures and conferences, there were prepared drinks and snacks; I just regarded it as a casual.
索尔克生物研究所是坐落在加州南部拉霍亚的一个独立非营利科学研究机构。它于1960年由乔纳斯·索尔克（Jonas Salk）创立，创始者中有雅各布·布罗诺夫斯基（Jacob Bronowski)）和弗朗西斯·克里克（Francis Crick）。1962年研究所正式投入运行。这所研究所是美国生命科学领域成果最多、质量最高的研究机构之一。在中国知道的人很少，多数人知道哈佛医学院。2004年，《时代高等教育》增刊将索尔克生物研究所列为世界第一的生物医学研究机构，2006年，《科学观察》将其列为神经科学和行为学领域全球第一的研究所。路易·康是索尔克生物研究所的设计者，在美国现代建筑师中，路易·康在建筑学上的地位相当高。他在1901年2月20日生于爱沙尼亚的萨拉马岛，1905年随父母移居美国费城，1924年毕业于费城宾夕法尼亚大学。大器晚成的他五十多岁时才真正成为一代宗师，他的建筑作品通常是在质朴中呈现出永恒和典雅，他阐述了建筑应该怎样在反映人类对本质的思考过程中创造的奇迹；他提到的光明与阴影，与他在建筑作品中善于把握光的作用一样，都启发着人们对存在和哲理的思考。
Salk Institute for Biological Studies was an independent non-profit scientific research institution located in La Jolla in southern California. It was founded by Jonas Salk in 1960, and the initiators included Jacob Bronowski and Francis Crick. The Institute was officially put into operation in 1962. It was one of the research institutions which achieved the most and of the highest quality from life science field in USA. It was rarely known by Chinese people, as most of them knew the Harvard Medical College. In 2004, the supplementary issue of “Times Higher Education” ranked Salk Institute for Biological Studies as the first biomedical research institution in the world, and In 2006, the "Science Observation" ranked it as the first institute all over the world in the field of neuroscience and Behavioral Science. Louis Kang was a designer of Salk Institute for Biological Studies who enjoyed a quite high status among American modern architects. He was born on the island of Saaremaa in Estonia, February 20, 1901, and immigrated with his parents to Philadelphia in America, 1905. He graduated from the University of Pennsylvania in Philadelphia, 1924. He who great minds matured slowly became a master until he was more than fifty, and whose works of architecture presented eternity and elegance in plain, he elaborated how the miracle was created by the architecture through reflection of human thinking on the nature; the light and shadow he mentioned, as well as that he was good at grasping the effect of light in architecture works, both inspired people to think about the existence and philosophy.
 
这样一些学术讲座在索尔克和圣地亚哥加州大学几乎天天有，多数是基础的分子生物学，无临床应用价值。当然基础研究是科学家的兴趣与爱好，也是生物学家赖以生存的工具，为了能晋升，为了能争取科研经费，他们需要发表文章，需要写研究经费申请报告，他们一生花在写经费申请报告的时间，约占职业生涯的一半，然而，拿到经费的概率只有10%，甚至更少。
Some academic lectures like these were held almost every day in Salk Institute and University of California, San Di ego, most of which were the fundamental molecular biology without the value of clinical application. Of course, basic research was the scientist's interest and hobbies as well as the biologists’ tool for survival. They needed to publish articles for promotion and to write application reports for research funding, and the time they spent on writing funds application in life is accounting for about half of their occupation career, however, the probability to get funding was only 10%, or even less.
 
这些科学家拼命干的目的，是希望得到经费，用于研究和生活。哪里有项目招标，哪里就有科学家的身影，为了争取到资金，拼命地思考出标新立异的项目，并设想着种种可能的答案，而一些药企或大商人会选择对自己感兴趣的项目慷慨解囊，赞助美国癌症研究学会（American Association for Cancer Research）、美国临床肿瘤学会（American Society of Clinical Oncology）的某些研究。各种各样的奖项，刺激着他们去申请，而药企或大商人拿出的这些钱，在美国还可以避税或减税。因此多数不是为了兴趣，只是为了生存。
The purpose for the scientists worked desperately was to get the funding which was used to study and life. Where there was project bidding, there were the figures of the scientists. They desperately thought of a rat-fuck project and imagined all sorts of possible answers in order to get the money, while some pharmaceutical enterprises or large merchants would choose the projects they interested then loosen their purse strings generously, sponsored certain research projects from America Association for Cancer Research, American Society of Clinical Oncology. Various awards stimulated them to apply for, and the money taken out from the pharmaceutical enterprises or large merchants, in America, can be tax avoidance or tax cuts, so most of the applications were just for survival rather than for interesting.
 
多数的哲学博士 (Doctor of Philosophy，Ph.D.)的工资，不像临床医学博士（Doctor of Medicine，M.D.）的工资那么高，因为这些临床医学博士可以一边做医生，一边做研究，他们主要出于兴趣，为在临床实践中遇到的困难和问题寻找答案，寻找解决的方案，这也是我比较欣赏的一种研究方式。在美国，这种医生社会地位较高，工资待遇较高。
Wages of most Ph.D was not so high as that of M.D., because these M.D could do as a doctor, while they were doing research which mainly out of their interest, to find answers to the difficulties and problems encountered in clinical practice and to find the solution schemes to them, which was also a way of research I appreciated relatively. In the USA, this kind of doctors enjoyed a relatively high social status with high salary.
 
中国留学生在国内学医，到了美国，有的人会去读哲学博士，目的是通过读哲学博士提高英语交流能力，同时有个学生身份在美国可以合法居留，有的人选择考美国的行医执照。在美国，临床医学博士一般都有行医执照，你考过执照，做完实习医生，就可以当医生。相比较而言在国内读了硕士、博士的人好像吃了大亏，其实没吃亏，打的基础好了，进步快，适应快。
Some of Chinese overseas students who had studied medicine domestic, in America, however would go to study Ph.D in order to improve their ability to communicate in English as well as with a pupilage they could legally reside in the USA., while some of them chose to take USA license to practice medicine. In American, clinical M.D generally has a license to practice medicine. If you passed the license exam, finished the intern, then you could be a doctor. Comparison at home the persons who had read a Master or a Doctor seemed to suffer heavy losses, in fact they didn't, a good basis of learning for faster progress and a adaptation quickly.
 
我见过不少的中国医学学士，到了美国后干得很好，当然，一开始也是费了不少劲，克服了不少困难，有的人还通过自学来补课。  
I had seen a lot of China Bachelor of medicine done very well in America, of course, who had to face a lot of trouble at the beginning, overcome many difficulties, and some of them even through self-study to make up their deficiency.
 
延安老兄就是其中一个，他没有研究生的经历，后来考取了行医执照，在美国就是当然的临床医学博士。我的中国朋友毛利（Mao Li）也很优秀，在著名的安德森肿瘤中心（M.D. Anderson肿瘤中心创建于1941年，是全世界最重要的癌症研究中心之一）当了教授，没有考行医执照，也是临床医学博士，也没有国内外研究生的经历。近年他又去了美国马里兰的一家口腔医学院当了系主任，为中国人争了光，如按国内的观点，他确实没有得过博士学位，但美国承认了他，又当了不同级别的教授，就是当然的临床医学博士。
Brother Yanan was one of them, he had not experience graduate, later he passed the exam and got the medical license who was a rightful M.D in USA. My Chinese friend Mao Li was also very excellent who had become a professor in famous M.D.Anderson Cancer Center (M.D. Anderson cancer center was founded in 1941, and it is one of the most important cancer research center all over the world) , he did not get the license to practice medicine, but also the clinical medical doctor, besides, he did not have the postgraduate experience either domestic or foreign. Recently, he went to be a dean of department in a stomatology college in Maryland, USA, which was honor for Chinese. According to the domestic viewpoint, he did not have a doctorate indeed, while USA admitted him; and he had become a professor at different levels, then of course a clinical medical doctor. 
 
美国任何一个大学的助理教授（Assistant Professor）、副教授（Associate Professor），或加冠于副（Adjunct）之类，条件之一是具有哲学博士或临床医学博士或同等学力，只要你在美国干得好，就能得到承认，这就是美国。这些人回国了，国内的观点与美国有所不同，那属于国情问题，不是个人能主宰的，我觉得，承认与否无关紧要，只要有能力就可以了。
One of the conditions for Assistant Professor, Associate Professor or other title with “Adjunct” from any University in the USA is Ph.D. or M.D. or equivalent, as long as you done well in USA, you would be admitted, this is America. When these people returned, however domestic viewpoint was different from that in America which belonged to the national affairs and could not be controlled by the individual, I thought, as long as you had capability, it was not important to be admitted or not.
　　像我就是这样，在美国得到了承认。回国了就按国内的规矩办，也没有问题。
在美国的研究室，我努力工作着，加班加点是经常的事，有时半夜睡不着，就到实验室搞研究，时常错过吃饭时间，饿了就随便找点吃的。就这样，两年很快过去了。
Just as I was, my M.D.was recognized in USA, while in China, it was no problem to go along domestic rules. 
As in American research, I worked very hard, and it was the often case to work overtime” Sometimes I could not sleep in the middle of the night, then I went to the lab to do experiment. I often missed the dinner time, be hungry then to grab something to eat. So, two years passed quickly.
 
1992年，我有幸在世界著名的索尔克做博士后研究。在这个研究所里，我如鱼得水，开始在美国崭露头角，我的科研成果于1994年曾得到美国陆军医学研究开发署（U.S Army Medical Research and Development Command）科学前途发展奖16万美元，当时我们实验室的十几个博士后中，就我跟另一个中国人得到这笔经费，一时惊呆他人，我俩都没有哲学博士。同时我也是首席科学家（Principle Investigator，PI），同时还被聘为该研究所的研究员，同年被破格聘为加州大学圣地亚哥分校医学院的助理教授。  
In 1992, I was honor doing postdoctoral research at Salk, the world famous institute where I felt myself just like a fish in water, began to cut a striking figure in America. My research results was granted the Future of Science Development Award with $160,000 by U.S Army Medical Research and Development Command in 1994, when there were more a dozen postdoctoral in our laboratory, only me and another Chinese fellow enjoyed this funding, and this stunned others, as neither of us was a Ph.D., at the same time I was also the Principle Investigator as well as appointed to be a researcher in the Institute, the same year I was employed to be assistant professor at the University of California, San Diego.
 
（以下部分及3、4、5节的译稿尚未校对，抱歉！还有第6节哦）
 
 
1.6在美国名校圣地亚哥加州大学肿瘤中心，跟导师斯奈尔学以致用
1.6 At the cancer center in University of California, San Diego, I studied to practice following supervisor Sinil  
我的第一个导师，私下都称老板，是位肿瘤科的临床医生，因在圣地亚哥加州大学肿瘤中心，所以他也是助理教授，能带博士生及博士后学生。斯奈尔在研究药物载体方面很有成就，发表过很多篇文章，并拥有一些专利如多室多层的脂质体（Liposome）缓释药物治癌症。中心主任史蒂文·豪威尔（Steven howell）教授也是一名肿瘤医生，肿瘤缓释泵化疗是他发明的，为此，他得到了一笔不小的资金。主任史蒂文在美国肿瘤界很有名气的，主办过美国多届肿瘤学术会议，他的实验室博士生较多，正在研究铂类耐药基因。我们同在一座楼，基本上是一个大实验室，他是大老板，斯奈尔是小老板，我直接归斯奈尔管，是他的学生，他的部下，为他打工的博士后。  
My first supervisor whom I privately called boss was a oncology clinician, as he was at the cancer center in University of California, San Diego, so he was also an assistant professor who could direct the doctoral and post doctoral students. Sinil had made great achievements in the study of drug carriers, published a lot of articles about them, and had some patents such as curing cancer using the sustained release drugs of multi chamber multilayer liposome. The center director, professor Steven·Howell is also a cancer doctor who invented the tumor sustained release chemotherapy and therefore gained a comparative sum of money. Director Steven was famous in the USA tumor field, had ever hosted the American Academic Conference on cancer; and many a few doctoral students were in his lab working on the research of platinum resistant gene. We were in the same building, almost the same big laboratory, and Director Steven was the big boss while Sinil was a small boss. I was directly under the supervising of Sinil i.e. I was his pupil, his follower and a postdoctoral working for him.
我在北京协和医科大学肿瘤医院读研究生的时候，我就专门研究过脂质体的合成、功能及应用，并发表了几篇文章，也算是第一个将脂质体用于淋巴结显像剂及骨髓显像剂的人。有基础研究，还有临床应用研究，这些在国内好像都没什么特别的，但到了美国，研究和发明用到了临床，人家就会高看你一眼。我的发明临床效果还不错，实验室里的美国人就更敬重我。
When I was a Graduate student at the Tumor Hospital of Union Medical College in Beijing, I had studied the synthesis, function and application of the liposome, and published several articles about it, so I was almost the first person of applying liposome to lymph node imaging agent and bone imaging. It seemed no especial domestic who had engaged in basic research and clinical application research, while in America as long as you applied the research and invention to clinical, people would see highly of you. The clinical effect of my invention was well, and the Americans in the lab respected me more.
 
到圣地亚哥加州大学填了一大堆表格，有的看懂了，有的一知半解。月薪1200美元，这要比公派留学生380—500美元的薪金高出了很多。填表时有一栏是需要选择的，哲学博士？还是临床医学博士？我觉得我既不能选临床医学博士，也不能选哲学博士。
At the University of California, San Diego, I filled out a thick pile of forms, some of which I understood while on some of which I had half-baked knowledge. Then I got a monthly salary of $1200, which was much higher than that of the government-funded student. As filling out the forms, a column in a form was needed to select: A doctor of philosophy? Or a clinical medical doctor? I thought neither could I choose the clinical medical doctor, nor the doctor of philosophy.
　　我便问导师斯奈尔，他说：“您填临床医学博士。”
　　我一再地向他申明：“我是医学硕士，大学医学学士，不是临床医学博士，也不是哲学博士。”
斯奈尔就反复给我讲，咱们一样都是临床医学博士，“你在中国已是医生并有学位证书，你的学校美国也承认，在我的实验室，做的是医学博士后的研究，那你就是临床医学博士。”
I asked my supervisor Sinil for help, and he told me: "Fill that you are a doctor of clinical medicine."
I declared to him once another: "I am a master of medicine, an University Bachelor of medicine instead of a clinical medicine doctor, nor the doctor of philosophy."
    Sinil told me again and again that we were the same as the clinical medical doctor, "You had been a doctor with a degree diploma in China, and your college is acknowledged in America, in my lab, you are engaged in the study of medicine postdoctoral, so you are the clinical medical doctor."
 
　　最后斯奈尔半开玩笑地说：“当然，你要在美国行医，是要考取行医执照的。”
　　我觉得还是不妥，他说：“好了，你如果读哲学博士，你就是临床医学博士加哲学博士，在美国有了临床医学博士，多数人不必再读哲学博士。有些哲学博士为了行医，也会选择读临床医学博士。你已经做得不错，没有必要再读哲学博士，太浪费时间，读哲学博士可能就是5—6年, 时间就是金钱啊。”
如果当年在美国我去读哲学博士, 前途肯定是另一样了。
Finally Sinil half made fun of me and said: "Of course, you have to get the license to practice medicine in America."
Still I felt it was not right, while he said: "Well, if you read the PhD, then you are both a clinical medical doctor and a PhD, while being a clinical medicine doctor, most in USA don't need to read the PhD. Some PhD may also choose to read the clinical medical doctor in order to practice medicine, while you have done a good job and no need to read the PhD which is too waste of time, may about 5 to 6 years, you know time is money."
If I had read a PhD in America, the future to me is certainly the other.
 
　　就这样，我成了博士后，跟着斯奈尔老板做博士后研究。
1990年斯奈尔研究的阿糖胞苷脂质体（嘧啶类抗代谢药物，通过抑制细胞DNA的合成，干扰细胞的增殖，是治疗癌症的一种药物和脂质的合成体）缓释药物已经相当不错，脊髓腔内注射，在脑脊液内存留二十天，可以治疗各种癌症的脑转移和脑膜转移。为了放大实验室的小样品，我做了很多工作。同时他还教会了我怎样利用他发明的药物缓释载体，小样品的脂质体我已经做得很好了。
In this way I became a postdoctoral, followed boss Sinil to do postdoctoral research.
In 1990, the sustained release drugs of liposomal cytarabine ( pyrimidine antimetabolites, the synthesis through inhibition of DNA, interference to cell proliferation, is synthesis of drugs and liposome for treatment of cancer) under Sinil’s research had been quite good, with intrathecal injection, stayed in the cerebrospinal fluid for twenty days, could cure various cancers of the brain metastases and meningeal metastasis. I did a lot of work in order to amplify the small samples in laboratory, while he taught me how to use the drug release carrier he invented, and I had done the liposome of small sample very well.
　　回国创业时，我还用中国的原料做成了多室囊的脂质体。
我和斯奈尔天天交流讨论，他几乎天天在考我，从免疫学到肿瘤学和制剂学，三天两头给我文章让我自学。仅仅三个月时间，我开始头疼、头晕，并且越来越厉害，找眼科医生一检查，我的眼睛300度近视，从此我就戴上了眼镜，成了现在这个样子。
When I returned to pioneering work, I also made the multi chamber bag liposome with Chinese raw materials.
Mr. Sinil communicated and discussed with me every day as well as he always tested me from immunology to oncology and pharmaceutics, gave me articles every two or three days for me taught myself. Just three months, I began to feel headache, dizziness more and more seriously, taken a check by a doctor at Department of Ophthalmology and learnt that the myopia of my eyes was to 300 degrees, since then I had to wear glasses, become the appearance like this now.
 
利用脂质体承载药物，肿瘤注射缓慢释放药物，维持药物在一个较高的浓度，从而持续地杀死肿瘤，效果比较好。斯奈尔导师已经发表了一些文章，让我研究瘤内脂质体缓释的动力学。我比较懂得计算机断层扫描（CT）、核医学将造影剂，泛影葡胺包埋于脂质体，行瘤内注射，于是立即进行计算机断层扫描（CT）扫描，记录出片，然后用治疗计划系统（Treatment Planning System）读出肿瘤内计算机断层扫描（CT）值及变化，分析出泛影葡胺在瘤内的变化情况。
The effect was relatively good of which using liposomes to carry drugs, tumor injection to slowly release the drugs to maintain a high concentration thereby to kill the tumor. Supervisor Sinil had published some articles, and he let me study dynamics of intratumoral liposome release. Relatively I knew computer tomography (CT), nuclear medicine will contrast agent, meglumine diatrizoate entrapped in liposomes, for intratumoral injection, then immediately scanned the computed tomography (CT), recorded sheets, and then used the Treatment Planning System to read out the value and the changes of the computer tomograqphy within the tumor tomography (CT) , analyzing the changes of meglumine diatrizoate in tumor.
我们还研究了肿瘤内酒精饱和抗癌药物，饱和液瘤内注射，因为瘤内酒精注射治疗肝癌从20世纪80年代就开始研究，效果并不理想。酒精凝固瘤内蛋白使肿瘤死亡，如果在蛋白凝固同时包埋其中，一些抗癌药物将会提高疗效，主要思路是斯奈尔提出的，由我完成，整个过程仅用了一年多。
We also study the saturated alcohol in tumor and anti-cancer drugs,  intratumoral injection in saturated liquid, as the study on intratumoral ethanol injection for treatment of liver cancer was startecd in 1980s and the effect was not ideal. Alcohol coagulated the protein in tumor to make tumor death, and it would improve the curative effect if at the same time of the protein coagulation and embedded them with some anticancer drugs. This idea is mainly put forward by Sinil, done by me(finished by me), and the whole process took more than one year.
 
实验一开始，患肿瘤的小鼠注射酒精后就昏过去，曾设法多次注射，效果也不好。反反复复浪费了很多时间，才使我想到如何让小鼠产生酒精耐受，买来新生小鼠就喂10%酒精，三天增一个量级，直至100%酒精。小鼠由于长期喝酒，长得也壮了许多，接种黑色素细胞瘤后，就长得很好。酒精饱和注射液瘤内注射，小鼠就不昏了，试验成功。
From the beginning of the experiment, the mice with tumor fainted after alcohol injection, and I had ever managed to do with multiple injections, still got the poor effect. The experiment was done repeatedly, wasting a lot of time, till it made me think about how to make the mice produce ethanol tolerance, then i bought the newborn mice and fed them with 10% alcohol, added an order of magnitude every three days, until the 100% alcohol. Due to long-term drinking, the mice grew up strong a lot, and even more better after vaccination of melanoma cells, as well as did not faint any more with injection of saturated alcohol and intratumoral. The test succeeded.
 
我多次在肿瘤中心会上发言，利用肿瘤组织凝固变性来缓释抗癌药物，从而达到更好的抗癌效果，这就是20年前我们提出的抗癌“缓释库”的原型。后来发表文章，那是在我离开美国约8年后发表的，我和斯奈尔导师共同署名。
I made speeches at the tumor center for many times, using tumor tissue coagulation degeneration to sustained-release anticancer drugs, so as to achieve a better effect of anticancer, which was the prototype of anticancer “ sustained-release base ” we proposed 20 years ago. Eight years later when I was out the USA, an article about the “sustained-release base " was published, co-signed by my supervisor Sinil and me.
 
斯奈尔研究脂质体缓释药物的目的不光是为了发表文章，他的目标是为临床病人治疗癌症。这不同于哲学博士研究理论发表文章是为争取更高的学术地位。斯奈尔开办了帝宝泰克（Depotech）公司，就是用他研究的缓释库抗癌药物的脂质体向美国食品药物管理局（Food and Drug Administration）申报批新药物。1998年美国食品药物管理局终于批准斯奈尔的抗癌药物上市了，同时他也上了美国的《纽约时报》，斯奈尔成了亿万富翁。跟他工作了两年，我学到的就是学以致用，把自己成果最终应用于病人，斯奈尔非常满意我所取得的成绩。
The goal for Sinil’s study on liposome sustained-release drug was clinical treatment for cancer patients rather than to publish articles which was different from an PhD who published articles on theory research in order to gain higher academic position. Sinil opened a company of Depotech, which was just using the liposome of sustained-release base anticancer drug he researched to declare new drugs from Food and Drug Administration USA. In 1998, Sinil’s anticancer drugs was approved to enter the market by Food and Drug Administration USA., at the same time he was also on the " New York Times" as well as became a billionaire. Working with him for two years, what I have learned is to learn for practice, applying the research  results on the patients, and Sinil was very satisfied with my achievements.
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